I am sat at the airport bar in Christchurch and I am just starting on my second beer. Nowadays you have to get drunk before you get on a plane. I still remember the old times, when a gorgeous stewardess would give you any booze you wanted for free with a beautiful smile on her face. Bad times for travellers indeed. You even go hungry on a plane if you’re not prepared to fork out for a meal yourself. The smiles and the fun are gone together with the gorgeous stewardesses, all being replaced by grumpy airline helpers with the charm of bored supermarket cashiers. You want to watch a movie? 10 dollars. You want to listen to the radio? 3 dollars for a headset. The only good news is that, for now at least, ticket prices have gone down a bit. Just wait for the next ‘oil crisis’, though.

And here I am, still nursing my beer, with a big grin on my face. People are looking at me in a strange way. You’re not supposed to show your happiness too openly, I guess. It makes people uncomfortable and conjures up images of an axe murderer. If they only knew! I’m on my way back to Indonesia, the land of infinite islands. I am truly enchanted by that country, by its people and by its diversity and I can’t wait to get back there. This time my travels will take me to Sulawesi and Kalimantan, none of which I know that much about. It doesn’t matter, though. Indonesia and I, we’ll understand each other somehow, we always have so far. Just to make sure, I have bought a phrasebook. I don’t need or want a guidebook, but a phrasebook will help me learn more of the language, which is one of my big goals for this trip.

For now I have more immediate problems than my worried fellow passengers. I have only one pair of socks left and they have big holes in them. I am pretty sure that I have to take my shoes off when I go through security and at times I can get quite self conscious. I don’t like people looking at me in a strange way. But hey, even if they do, why should I care? I’m off to Indo…

1. Good Karma

   The world should be governed by well travelled people. We know how important it is to do well by the people we meet, be they locals or fellow travellers. And in the end you will get back whatever you paid forward. This is something I strongly believe in.

2. Food

   Being a traveller is like being a soldier. Eat while you can. You never know when your next meal will be. Food is one way of taking in a new culture and experiencing new things, so when it comes to food you should always go local or at least have a go at it.

3. Camera Memory Cards

   Murphy’s Law in this case states that whenever you see something truly amazing your camera will angrily flash at you and give you the finger. By the time you deleted some of those old crappy stupid photos your first ever elephant will have vanished into thin air or only show you his bum. Always have enough memory left by the time you leave your crappy guesthouse room in the morning and always have a spare memory card, so you can switch. And always switch early rather than too late.

4. Patience

   If you’re not patient on the road you’ll be miserable a lot. There’s misunderstandings, people around you when all you want is being left alone and there’s waiting, a lot of waiting actually. There are language problems, a lot of hassle with touts and loads of other people trying to take advantage. Just take it easy. After all you could be sitting in an office being bored beyond witless.

5. Passport Photos

   This is something you seriously can’t have enough of. You’ll need them for visa applications, visas and then some more visa applications. In some places getting just four passport photos made can be ridiculously expensive, so stock up when you’re in a cheap place. Get like 20. You’ll thank me later.

6. Condoms

   Although it might be slightly awkward carrying an extra large pack of your favourite flavoured little friends around it’s always a turnoff not having one ready when you so desperately need one. Remember to pack them in a cool and shady spot in your backpack and use them fast. They don’t travel very well.

7. Drugs

   Mushrooms, ganja, alcohol or whatever else takes your fancy. Travellers love trying new things and drugs seem to be very much part of the rite of passage. On the low side they can get you into deep trouble. The kind of trouble where you look at the same room for 10 years or even the kind of trouble that dramatically reduces your life expectancy to zero. On the high side drugs, if used sparingly and if you stay clear of the hard stuff, can make you perceive your surroundings in a completely new and different way. Drugs travel even less well than condoms!

8. Time

   Without time you only have haste and that’s the death of every genuine memorable experience. 23 countries in as many days is not the way you should travel. I’m the last person to tell you how you have to travel, but just this once I’ll have to do exactly that. Take your time, travel slowly, and get to know a place rather than rush through it. Not seeing everything you wanted is just a reason for another trip.

9. Fun

   This one’s quite obvious and it almost didn’t make the list. It’s very important, though. There are many times when you have anything but fun. When you’re sick, frustrated or just plain fed up with it all. This is normal. The trick is to have more fun than not and maybe develop a bit of a selective memory. Forget the bad stuff, except when it makes a great story, and remember the fun.

10. Diarrhoea Pills

    Bombay belly, the bane of all travellers. Very hard to avoid unless you have a stomach that’s not upset by copious amounts of chilli, foreign bugs or undercooked chicken. Once you stood under the shower for hours with food and drink coming out of every opening you realize that what you need is the biggest and most powerful stop-the-runs pill ever produced. Seriously, pack some!

11. Money

    Some backpackers have hit the jackpot. Literally. There was one English dude who won a million bucks on New Zealand’s Lotto system. In case you haven’t been that lucky and mum and dad don’t feel like financing your global escapades, then you need cash. Spend it wisely. Not saying you need a lot of cash to travel, but the more you have the longer you can travel without the inconvenience of work.

12. Common Sense

    Sometimes you can get yourself into a bit of a situation. Thailand and its lady boys or drugs or gambling or a combination of all of em are just a few examples. Just ask yourself what would your mum want you to do? And remember, if she’s got bigger hands than you, put that drink down and have a closer look before you take her home.

Do you have anything to add to this list? I welcome your comments!

A ferry can be a crowded place full of people, fridges, scooters, satellite dishes and animals. In a place like Indonesia boats are the most used mode of transportation.

After being cooped up for far too long with far too many party nights in this little place called Queenstown I am finally off again in one week to my favourite country of all time, Indonesia. The Dutch, the English and the Portuguese once fought over it a few hundred years ago. But while they were unsuccessful in the long run, the Australians are doing a much better job right now, slowly and sneakily taking over Bali and beyond.

I’m in a bit of a predicament right now. According to Wikipedia there are 17.508 islands. Some time ago an earthquake created 6 more somewhere off Sumatra, so I’m a little undecided right now on where to go. I don’t want to stay too long on Bali. This has hardly nothing to do with the loud Australians, who I’m quite fond of, and more to do with the overall touristic busyness of the place. So my first option would be to head over to Java, check out Borobudur and some national parks and then slowly make my way along Sumatra all the way to Pulau Weh. I have a plane ticket from Medan to KL at some point, so that route would make a lot of sense.

But then, I never actually planned on using that ticket. One rule for getting an Indonesian visa is that you have to produce an onward ticket. Only when you arrive by plane, though, so there you go. My second option would be to catch a Pelni or cheap flight to Makassar on Sulawesi, do some diving, see if some people are getting buried in Tana Toraja and then head over to Kalimantan, which I have to admit I know not much about. Yet. Maybe somehow do a little quick visa run across to Sarawak and spend another 2 months in the Indonesian part of Borneo.

What would you do if you were in my pants?

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This pic was taken quite some time ago while on a pleasure dive somewhere deep around Simon’s Reef close to Gili Trawangan. It was after the tsunami and we hadn’t had any customers for some time, so we just took the boat out for fun.

There should be 8 monkeys. Can you spot them all?

Anyways, I have a few invites available, if anyone is interested. Just tell me your favorite travel story and a magic email will fly into your inbox. First come, first serve, lads and lasses…

This list, which only existed in my head until now, started out with number 3 around 20 years ago and I’ve added destinations and trips to it as I found out about them. In time places moved up and down or disappeared completely as I visited them. There’s obviously many more places I want to see and things I want to do, but there’s got to be something special to make it onto my top 10…

1. Travel up the Congo River
   The Congo, in the heart of Africa, represents for me the magic I associate with that continent. Lush rainforest, genuine experiences and extremely hard travelling!
2. Drive from Capetown to Marrakesh
   When I was little my Dad always brought travel magazines like Tours back home. A lot of them dealt with off road tours through Africa, how to outfit cars, which routes to take and so on. It obviously left an impression on me.
3. Hitchhike from Munich to Beijing
   I was around 9 years old when I first thought it’d be awesome to drive all the way from my hometown to China. In time this has morphed into hitchhiking, as a cheaper, more flexible, but probably more dangerous alternative.
4. Dive and travel Antarctica
   Huge icebergs, penguins, sea lions and many more amazing animals. Just imagine what the underwater world looks like there…
5. Navigate the Mekong River
   I have crossed the Mekong many times in many countries and the idea to help navigate a boat from China all the way to Vietnam has been growing ever since.
6. Explore the Bamiyan valley in Afghanistan
   Ever since I heard about the huge Buddhas I wanted to see them for myself. Even though they have been destroyed by the Taliban regime I still want to go and explore the little caves left behind by Buddhist monks.
7. Experience the Hajj
   I am not a Muslim or very religious, but there’s something about the pilgrimage to Mecca that I find fascinating. Maybe it’s a couple of millions of people in the same place actually believing in a God. That’s got to make for a special atmosphere.
8. Live among the Orang Laut for some time
   The Orang Laut are scattered all across Southeast Asia. The name literally means ’sea people’. Their way of life, so closely connected with the ocean they live on, has always fascinated me and in a way I can identify with that.
9. Travel to the (original) Burning Man
   Nowadays there’s a few BM branches around, but I’d like to see the original in Black Rock Desert in Nevada.
10. Cross the Sahara on the back of a camel
    Just another one of my weird dreams. Call me a romantic with no sense of realism, but I think this would be a fantastic experience.

Will I ever make it to all of those places, do all of those trips? To be honest, I doubt it. There are too many variables. Some of those countries aren’t really that safe (yet), I am perpetually in a state of near bankruptcy and a couple of those trips shouldn’t really be done. That’s not the point of this list though. My wish list ,or dreams if you like, are an indication for the kind of experiences and adventures I want and seek and usually they push my limits a little bit further out. It’s my minds way of telling me that I’m ready for the next step away from my comfort zone.

It’s important to have dreams as well. Without them I might as well work on my tan on Ballerman 6. What are your travel dreams?